When do you feel treated extraordinary well? If you get what you ask for? Probably not; it will remain an average “OK”. Sometimes, however, things are different and the result feels unexpectedly and overwhelmingly positive. What’s the magic formula behind some people’s success in sales, service or other jobs? What do they do different to satisfy their clients in a way that seems to be just more than an average “OK”?
QBQ – The Question Behind The Question by John G. Miller finds answers and gives some practical examples how to apply this mindset to your own life.
Going beyond the ordinary
The book starts with a nice example of the author trying to order Diet Coke in a restaurant which only has regular Pepsi on the menu. After being educated about this fact, he chooses water and gets what was ordered a couple of minutes later. Regular service, average “OK”. But the story doesn’t stop there: after a while, a Diet Coke is put on his table. The waiter asked his manager (who was less busy than him in that moment) to get the drink from the grocery store around the corner… and there it is: the magic moment of an extraordinary effort.
QBQ = asking better questions
While this is a very positive example of avoiding the average, the book provides some situations that most of us probably know very well:
- Why did I fail the test again?
- When will he do what I asked for?
- Why did she get the promotion that I hoped for?
Try to give some fictive answers. E. g. the first question:
- Because question 1, 3, 5 and 7 were answered wrong
- Because I did not learn hard enough
- Because the test was too hard
Will these answers help you to succeed if you do the test again? I doubt it and so does the philosophy of the QBQ:
The definition of the QBQ: A tool that enables individuals to practice personal accountability by making better choices in the moment. And we accomplish this by asking better questions of ourselves.
[…]One of the guiding principles of the QBQ is “The answers are in the questions,” which speaks to the same truth: If we ask ourselves a better question, we get a better answer.
John G. Miller: QBQ – loc 182 and 222 (Kindle)
What would be a better way of asking “Why did I fail the test again?”. The book follows a three-step advice to avoid what it calls “Incorrect Questions (IQs)”:
- Start with “What / How” instead of “Why / When / Who”
- Frame the question with “I” instead of “we / they / you” to ensure personal responsibility
- Focus on specific actions (“What can I do?”)
Let’s dissect “Why did I fail the test again?”: it starts with the wrong word (“why”) and ends without a specific action. At least the questioner admits a personal responsibility by asking himself (“I”) and not blaming others. Still, it is very easy to find excuses that the test was too hard, it was bad luck or just didn’t focus enough on the test. None of that will help you to solve the real issue. So let’s try to re-frame by asking QBQs:
- What topics do I need to delve into for succeeding in the first part of the test?
- How can I be more attentive to avoid unnecessary mistakes?
- What learning methodology will help me to better remember topic XYZ?
Most likely the answers (and respective actions!!) to these questions might help to do better in the test next time…
The QBQ applied to daily life
First, don’t waste your time in focusing on what you don’t have. The book deliberately asks you to think “within the box”, not outside of it. Try to find answers achievable with the given constraints by asking the right questions: How can I increase sales by 2% with the resources I have today? Everybody will find great answers by ignoring the limits and asking for a 50% marketing budget increase but that’s why many people don’t achieve extraordinary results.
A very nice QBQ for bosses who want to be leaders: “As a leader, I’m here to help you reach your goals. What can I do for my employee to bring her to the next level?”
“Servant leadership” is the QBQ way, and it requires a humble spirit combined with a servant’s heart. Humility is the cornerstone of leadership.
John G. Miller: QBQ – loc 768 (Kindle)
Some more QBQ examples: How can I empower my sales team to stay motivated in times of cost cutting? What can I do to better understand my partner’s point of view?What do I have to change to embrace my current working environment? Maybe – but hopefully not – the only right answer for you is: I have to change the job. What information would I expect from this presentation if I were the boss?
But what’s so wrong about asking “When can I do XYZ?”? It makes gives your answer the chance to delay things and too easily leads to procrastination. Try it out and you will see how your inner temptation will try to sell you surprisingly lenient deadlines…The more you delay the more expensive will be your way to success. It is TQM (Total Quality Management) turned around where every error at a later stage will be 10 x more expensive than if it had been fixed earlier (imagine: fix component = 10$, rebuild final product = 100$, recall whole product line = 1,000$, get sued = 10,000 $….).
Personal Accountability
Asking better questions is a good start but it won’t suffice if you don’t take action and take accountability. QBQ states – contrary to many team building practises – that there is absolutely an “I” in a team. The explanation makes sense to me:
[…] if everyone is asking, “What can we do?” then nobody is asking, “What can I do?” John G. Miller: QBQ – loc 554 (Kindle)
To a certain extent, if there is no ownership and accountability, individuals can protect themselves against progress by pointing to the “team”. That’s why team tasks should be broken down to individual goals with individual accountability unless you have a team with the QBQ mindset 🙂
But it’s also about stopping to complain about a situation and being in the “victim mode”. Sure, sometimes things are tough and against you but it will not change anything if you start to whine. A good set of QBQs and some thoughts on how to solve them might get you out of this mess far more efficiently. Be good enough to beat the ref and accept things beyond your control!
I will let the book summarize the key philosophy:
We need the QBQ so our organizations can be places where, instead of finger-pointing, procrastinating, and separating ourselves into “we” and “they,” we bring out the best in each other, work together the way teams are supposed to, and make great things happen.
John G. Miller: QBQ – loc 898 and 953 (Kindle)
References and further reading
QBQ! – Tools and Documents
Web-URL: https://qbq.com/
